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Sunday, March 10, 2013

Confidence: What I've Observed

It's a lot easier for me to believe in myself when others believe in me, too.

For example, I think I'm a slow runner but I believe that I can improve. The Boy, however, thinks that I'm already a pretty fast runner (considering). He says this with relative frequency.

And wouldn't you know, I've performed better than I could have ever imagined in the last few races I've run.

Am I running better because I'm training hard? Certainly.

But am I running better because my husband speaks words of affirmation to me as I'm training? It seems likely.

Words of affirmation speak strongly to me in part because this is one of my love languages. However, I think there's a greater principle in play here.

Confidence can't exist in a vacuum.

I may feel confident in something, but if others don't share my confidence I may find myself being confidently wrong.

I may lack confidence in something, but when others share their belief in my abilities, capabilities, ideas, etc, I'm able to tap into a group confidence.

Without others, the equation looks like this:

Confidence = (Faith + Ability) / Experience

With others, the equation looks more like this:

Confidence = ((Faith + Ability) / Experience) * Belief

It's just another example of why we aren't meant to go it alone.

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